There’s no denying that starting a conversation with a complete stranger can be awkward. Whether you're sliding into someone's DMs or trying to chat up that cutie at the bar, that initial interaction can feel like a high-stakes game of social roulette.
But I’m here to tell you that it is actually possible to break the ice without breaking a sweat. All it takes is a little awareness and authenticity.

Online dating: where "hey" goes to die

Let's start with the digital dating world. We've all found ourselves staring blankly at a profile, trying to conjure up something wittier than "hey" (because seriously, "hey" is the online dating equivalent of a shrug).
Here's the secret: personalization is key. Instead of generic greetings, spend a few minutes perusing their profile and lead with something specific:
"Okay, I have to know—is that a Golden Retriever in your photo? I have one named Max, and he's basically my furry soulmate."
"Your trip to Iceland looks incredible! I'm dying to go. What was your favorite part?"
“Your profile says you’re a beekeeper and I can’t play it cool … I’m really intrigued. How did it become a hobby?
See the difference? These openers show you've actually looked at their profile and are interested in what they’re sharing with the world. Plus, they invite a response, which is the whole point, right?

IRL: the art of the approachable

Now, let's talk about real-life interactions. For most of us, this is the far scarier proposition because there’s no level of screen anonymity to hide behind.
The trick with this one? Context is everything. Use your surroundings to give you an “in.” Here are a few examples:
In the fiction section of a bookstore: "Are you a Celeste Ng fan? Have you read Little Fires Everywhere? I'm looking for a new book of hers to dive into but wondering if this one is worth it." (This shows shared interests and opens the door for recommendations.)
At a museum or art gallery: "That sculpture is incredible, isn't it? I’m really into found-object pieces. What do you think of it?" (This invites them to share their thoughts and interpretations.)
At a fitness class or gym: "This class is tough! Have you tried Dee’s other class on Thursdays?" (Shared struggle builds camaraderie.)
Remember: no matter the scenario, be genuine, respectful, and yourself. The goal is to spark a connection, not force a conversation.

Rejection happens (but it's not the end of the world)

Look, not every conversation is going to turn into a love connection. And that's okay! Rejection is a part of life, and it's important not to take it personally.
The more you practice striking up conversations, the easier it will become. So get out there, be yourself, and have fun! You never know who you might meet.