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Seven ways you know you’re all set to jump into the sack

M.J. Santos   |   Fri, 10 May 2024

Navigating new relationships can feel like exploring uncharted waters. When it comes to the big question of when to introduce sex, there’s no real right or wrong as long as you’re both game, but it can still be helpful to have some emotional markers along the way.

So let’s make a splash with the ultimate seven-step checklist to ensure your relationship will sail smoothly into intimate waters.

1. Chatter matters: are you opening up or missing out?

The foundation of intimacy is built on great communication. Are you comfortable discussing everything from your funniest childhood memories to your deepest personal values? This verbal connection is sometimes an essential clue that you’re ready to take things to the next level.

Pro tip: Try discussing a topic that makes you slightly uncomfortable. If you both handle it with care and understanding, you’re on the right track.

2. Trust and comfort: have you found a cozy cocoon?

Trust is about more than believing they won’t spill your secrets (though that’s super important). It’s about feeling safe enough to be your truest self around them. Are you there yet? If so, it’s a great sign that you’re emotionally ready for some sexy time. Know what else is? Being able to laugh about embarrassing moments together. Blushing can bond ya!

3. Consent: is your ‘yes’ a ‘hell yes’?

Consent isn’t just about agreeing; it’s about enthusiasm. Both partners should feel excited and confident about moving forward. It should feel right for both of you—without any hesitation. A better way to think about this might be: if it’s not a ‘hell yes,’ it’s a hell no!’

4. Bonds that bind: do you feel like a team?

Evaluate the depth of your emotional connection. Are your feelings in harmony, and do you genuinely care about each other's happiness and wellbeing? Think about whether you feel emotionally supported. Strong emotional bonds make physical intimacy more meaningful.

5. Safety session: have ya talked health and protection?

The health talk might be less than sexy, but it’s absolutely essential. Are you both committed to transparency about health and safety practices? Have you had open discussions about them, covering topics likes contraception and STI prevention? Make sure you’re on the same page about this before you get between the sheets.

6. Future tense: is your relationship GPS aligned?

Real talk: are you both looking for a fling, or are you in it for the long haul? If your answers to those questions lie on opposite sides of the spectrum, hit pause. It’s essential that you clarify expectations about the relationship’s trajectory to avoid any misunderstandings that could cause emotional turbulence later.

7. Ready, set, go: did you check your own engine?

Finally, it’s important to check in with yourself. Strip away the external pressures and focus on your own feelings. Are you personally ready for this step? Consider if you’re moving forward for yourself or to meet perceived expectations from your partner or society.

There ya have it! Seven checkpoints to navigate as you’re assessing if you’re ready for sex. If you’ve checked most of these boxes with confidence, your relationship might be ready to explore new intimate depths. If not, there’s no rush—every couple has their unique pace.


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